Akhirnyaaa…
12 tahun setelah lulus SMA, niat kuliah akhirnya muncul. :D
Sari baru aja mulai – semester 1 – jurusan Sistem Informasi di STIKOM Bali. Rasa tertarik terhadap coding akhirnya bisa membuat Sari niat sekolah lagi. Hehe…
Semoga kuliahnya lancar, no halangan, cepet lulus… Amiiinnn… :p
Kalau ada temen yang ternyata kuliah bareng disana, add PIN BB Sari yaa.. 2BFDEA85 .. :)
After a while, I’m beginning to wonder if I’m an egoistic person for wanting to be heard when my feelings are crushed without caring about what he thinks.
But… This is how I feel……….
Whenever he gets near that thing, I get nervous, scared, frustrated.
Even though nothing is going on.
Am I wrong?
Should he stop everything for a minute to calm my heart?
Or should I be the one to bury my bleeding heart for the sake of letting him be?
Anyway, tonight, I’m the one burying it.
Ah, feeling dismissed.
Today I’m feeling blank. Maybe because I just found out that someone I love and look up to, actually does stuff that I look down on.
Today my colour is black. Black as my feelings, black as my heart, black as my thoughts, black as night.
Hopefully I can “restore” myself to a better state soon.
Hopefully.
I have been learning web coding lately. HTML, CSS, Javascript, jQuery…. I’m really enjoying it. I like finding out how things happen on websites. But it gets frustrating when I want to talk about it to people close to me. None of them understand what I’m saying, and mostly they are not even interested. :(
I thought about going on online forums, but I’m not confident enough yet, because I think I still don’t know enough and I don’t want to be mocked by the more advanced coders.
So, I’m thinking about joining a web programming course in Denpasar. At least then I would have friends to talk to about learning to code, and of course I would learn even faster (I hope!).
I’m going to check the place out on Monday. Wish me luck! :D
Btw, here are the websites that I built (still based on other peoples themes – but customised – mainly the CSS part):
Sometimes I try to impress others too much.
I would force myself to do things that my heart says no to, just to get a smile.
It is weird how sometimes I feel that it’s hard to stop being nice. Especially when it means that I’m being mean to myself.
Ah, I would love to be able to be a bitch sometimes, without caring what the outcome will be, without thinking about people’s feelings, without, first, intoxicating my brain.
That would be, indeed, priceless.
But then again, I guess, that wouldn’t be me.
Wan Wan was a race horse
Tu Tu was one too
Wan Wan won one race
Tu Tu won one too
I always expect people around me to change toward a “better person” in my eyes, but that just makes me annoyed because of the lack of times it does happen. Especially when I realise that I am not changing for them either.
I have to accept the facts:
1. Things change.
2. People don’t change.
Then again, remembering the theory is much easier than doing it.
